Love/Hate

I've got a love/hate relationship with working holidays.

The hate part has nothing to do with missing out on family activities.

The love part has nothing to do with the extra money I bank.

Nah, it's all about the phone.

I hate/love answering the phone on a day like today. Why? Because according to a very scientific study done by myself and whoever else answers the phone, 3 out of 5 calls is a "Are you open today?" or "What time are you open until today?"

My favorite was on Christmas Eve when after we were closed I did answer the phone after a few rings. The guy thanked me for answering (wtf?) And then wondered how late we were open. I can't lie. I did enjoy saying we were closed. Same as when I was walking to my car at half past and people were walking up and I got to tell them we were closed. I'm mean. 

I love keeping tallies. I do. It's kind of fun to see how many people call within a shift and ask the question. But then I hate it-the "are you open" question specifically- because if we weren't open do you think I'd be answering the phone on the second ring, numbnuts? Oy. Or better yet one the person who is supposed to answer the phone is busy and it rings about 15 times and then the person on the line asks "Are you open?" I really want to say, "Really? You just let a phone ring 15 times to a place you're not even sure of is open? Wouldn't most people think 'hey! They must be closed!' after the tenth?"

Or there's the other favorite when someone makes a comment about how it's too bad I'm working on a holiday. Well you know what, bud? If I wasn't you wouldn't be here buying all these unnecessary supplies!"

I'm an angry individual at times, what can I say?

Anyway....

I had a complete weirdo I had to deal with the other day. I was looking up something for him on the computer and I swear to god he was holding a conversation with himself. And then he was telling me about his problem how they had been in the other day and they had bought such and such. I really wanted to ask him if "they" were the imaginary people he was talking to. Then he asked me if I remembered when there was deposits on glass bottles of soda. I said no I'm not that old. And he said it was in the mid-80s to which I replied I was barely alive in the 80s. Really you psycho? You think I look that old?! You jerk. He's been added to my list of people to avoid at all costs. Him, mullet man and EveryDayCreeper are all people I head in the other direction when I see. Oh and the guy who wears the exact same thing EVERY SINGLE TIME he is in the store.

I've got to go eat more candy. I think I've only ate my weight in it today.

The Final Middle Finger

So here's something I thought of at work the other day.

Do you think Christians eat ham on Easter as an extra "f you" to Jews?

You know since kosher Jews don't eat pork products and it's Easter which is the epitome of Christian hate towards Jews. That whole "Hey you killed our Savior you BASTARDS!" when if you stop and think about it had Jesus not been crucified he'd just be another dude and not The Chosen One. But that's not the point. No the point is just a random thought that is a sign I either a) have too much time on my hands at work or b) my job is so routine I can think about these things. Ham on Easter. Is it or is it not a middle finger to Jews?

Or will Jesus coming back be the final middle finger? Yeah, that'd probably stick it to them more.

Then again maybe Jews will get the final finger when another dude shows up and turns out to be the Messiah.

Only time will tell. Though I wouldn't bet on it.


Since we're on the topic of Judaism...I totally might have to buy some kosher for Passover potato chips just because! It does start on Tuesday after all...I should try to keep a Passover diet. With the exception of buying kosher meat that is, I don't know where to buy it. I could do it. I've got two days to figure out what to eat for a week though...