These are a few of my least favorite things!

Yes, a variation of the title has recently been used. Deal!

Anyway. When I get in a funk, usually at work, things that annoy me tend to be on my mind. More then likely because the person in front of my is displaying one of the annoying habits. I think that in the broad scheme of things, I bitch about things but they don't truly piss me off. Yeah they annoy me but overall I can deal. I'm tolerant. Then there are a few things that make my blood boil. The things that really irk me. I might have made a list the other day. The list isn't complete nor is it really long. Here it is.

1. People Who Do Not Speed Up When Merging Into Traffic.
Really. This one deserves to be number one because I HATE IT!! Seriously! Yes there are times when you can't and so that is understandable but I'd have to say 95% of the time you can get up to at least 50 when merging. This is where my road rage comes out. Believe you me, if I'm trying to get on the Interstate and some dumb ass is going about 30 I'm screaming at them. WHY?! If you speed up, moron, it'll be easier to get over! It isn't safe going into 70 mph traffic at the blistering speed of 32! It just...AHH! oooooh! When that happens and there's an opening I don't wait until the lane ends. I cross the white line. Then go by them yelling. It pisses me off!

2. Blatantly Bad Grammar.
I'm not a stickler when it comes to things like who and whom. Spelling? Forget about it, I'm no good at it. I screw up punctuation, not gonna even pretend that I'm perfect. What gets me is when people say things like "Those ain't $2.95!" while pointing at a single melon. And don't get me started on ain't. An ain't here and there, fine. It's the frequent use by a single perpetrator that annoys me. Oh, up to 10 ain'ts today and it ain't even noon! Is isn't hard to say? I don't think it ain't. Yeah....totally taking it a step too far. It's the confusion of possession and plurals. It's redneck hillbilly speak that gets me. Someday I just want so say to a person, "can you hear yourself speak?! you sound like a freaking moron!" But I don't. I keep my anger on the inside.

3. People Who Grunt/Moan When Doing An Activity That Does Not Require Such A Noise.
Everyone does it. You life something heavy, "uh!" You whack your knee so you let out a moan of pain. But when people go on for five minutes making such noises, me no likey. It makes me a little uncomfortable. Should I be like "Excuse me Ma'am, can you handle the roll of paper towels or is it a bit much?" I guess this is an action that doesn't so much make my blood boil as it makes it awkward. If awkward blood is possible... Anyway. It just...I don't like it! I don't! I really, really don't! Watching tennis is a nightmare for me! You don't hear other athletes do those nasty sounding "UHHHHHS!" with every move. Ok. Tennis watching isn't really a nightmare because a. I don't watch it. b. I can see how it warrants a grunt here or there. Still seems a little wrong. You talk you your mother with that mouth, (insert tennis star name)?

4. Loud Gum Chewers.
Should all rot in hell. No, not really. This is another sort of grey area because sometimes it brings me within an inch of snapping. Other days, not so much. But the days it annoys me. Oh boy. If I were ever to snap at someone I didn't know, it'd be over that. When customers come through the line smacking away I just wanna be like "why don't you shut your fucking mouth already?! Is that too difficult for you there bucko?" Inherited it from my mother. It's that sloshy spit filled sound. Blach! Oh, people with spit filled voices are like finger nails on the chalkboard to me. You must have heard one. There was one on a video we watched in a class once and I almost blew my top. And then when people talk to you while chewing. When I chew gum I don't think I chew it while speaking. If I do it isn't with such vigor my speech is impaired.

Ok. I feel better. I'm sure at some point I'll find more to add.

C-ya suckers!